The Restaurant

       The place was a yuppie paradise, not his first choice for a hangout
but it was convenient to work and after a late night it was the best place
to catch dinner. He sat in a booth by himself, having already eaten and
paid for his meal, finishing up his coffee while he finally got a chance to
read the paper. Suits, both male and female, walked past his table in twos
and threes and fours, mostly full of margaritas and loud conversation.
       After a while, he was forced to look up and roll his stiff neck around
slightly. He took the opportunity to look around the restaurant out of no
more than casual interest, taking in what seemed to be a massive colony
of clones. As he scanned the place, though, his attention was suddenly
caught by a petite woman sitting at the bar. Dressed like nearly
everyone else in a dark suit, she stared into her drink and nodded while
her companion kept up a steady monologue. Her hair was very dark and
cut in a flattering bob, and her complexion a flawless olive, but though
she was attractive, he couldn't say why she had piqued his interest.
       He continued to watch. From where he was sitting, he had a perfect
three-quarters view of her, yet there was no way she could tell he was
staring unless she turned all the way around. She nodded and smiled
occasionally in response to her friend, but it wasn't until she picked up
a cocktail napkin to dab at her nose that he noticed something else about
her: her nose was reddish and her eyes watery. Although he couldn't
hear at that distance and over the din of the restaurant, watching
closely made it clear that she was sniffling on a pretty regular basis, as
her head jerked up slightly each time she did.
       Though her companion, a tall, pleasant-looking blonde woman, didn't
notice, he realized that the dark woman appeared to be gradually paying
less and less attention to her friend. Her lips had parted slightly, and
even from where he was he could see that she was breathing deeply and
a little irregularly. She rubbed her nose once quickly with the back of
her hand and sniffed again, but it didn't seem to do any good -- in fact,
just the opposite. Her eyes began to squint, and she started taking in
one big breath as her mouth opened wider. One hand fumbled on the bar
for the discarded cocktail napkin while her eyes half-closed and her
eyebrows lifted, as she was obviously trying to hold off the moment. He
watched, mesmerized, as the expression seemed to last a lifetime, before
she finally found the napkin just in time to sneeze violently into it, her
head jerking forward and eyes squeezing shut. He was surprised that
despite all the noise around him, the sound of the sneeze reached him
faintly but perfectly: "Ha-ISHoo!"       The woman's companion turned her
head and he could see her form the words "Bless you." The dark woman
nodded her thanks, but kept the cocktail napkin over her nose, a look of
concentration on her face. Only seconds later, her eyes half-closed
again, she took in another deep breath, and she sneezed into the napkin
a second time, a little louder: "Ha-ISHHHoo!" Before her friend had time
to react, the woman sneezed yet again with barely a pause for breath,
jerking forward violently. "HEHissshhh!"
       Mesmerized, he watched as the woman opened her eyes and drew in
another breath, then held it, apparently waiting. He could see her teary
eyes shining, and imagined he could even see her nostrils flaring
slightly, as she waited to see if the tickle would blossom or disappear.
After what seemed an eternity, she relaxed, wiping her eyes with the
napkin and then blowing her nose quickly. Her friend asked a question,
but the dark woman waved away her concern with a casual reply of some
kind. They went back to their "conversation," and he reluctantly went
back to his paper.
       A few minutes later, however, something -- instinct? -- made him
look up again, and he was glad he did. The dark woman was frozen in the
perfect pre-sneeze expression: breath held, mouth open, eyes
half-closed. One hand fanned the air quickly beside her face in either a
"come on!" or "stop!" gesture, he couldn't tell which. Finally, her head
pulled downward and she sneezed against the back of her hand, but
before even a second passed, she inhaled quickly and sneezed again in
the exact same way. This sneeze was followed by another, then another,
in what looked to be a genuine fit. "HaISSH! Huh...haISSSH!
Huh...haISSSH! Huh...ha-ISSHHH! Huh...haISSSHH!" She inhaled once
more, oblivious to the stare of her friend and the more discreet stares of
those around her, and after an agonizing moment let out one more
sneeze, which even from where he was he could tell was wetter and more
congested than the previous had been. "Ha-ISSHHHooo!"
       The woman recovered slowly as her friend bent over her with
concern, handing her another napkin. The dark woman took it, nodding
again, and used it to wipe away the tears streaming down her cheeks and
then to blow her nose. Her face was red, whether from exertion or
embarrassment he couldn't tell. After she had gotten her breath back,
she turned to her friend and said something with an apologetic look on
her face. Her friend nodded understandingly, and the woman stood up
from the bar.
       At that moment, he stood too, casually stretching and gathering his
things, but keeping an eye on the dark woman. She stepped away from
the bar and headed off around the corner, and keeping some distance
between them, he followed. She was heading for a side door that was left
open for air, and as she made her way through the tables he noticed her
raise her hand to her nose and pinch it shut as her speed increased
slightly. Thinking quickly, he grabbed a few cocktail napkins from the
bar as he passed it, and followed her to the door as though that had been
his original destination too.
       When he caught up, she was standing in the doorway, which was
isolated from the rest of the place by a short hallway, so they were alone.
Before he even reached her, he heard her draw in a big breath, and her
hands went to her face, covering her nose and mouth. A series of stifled
sneezes emerged, one after the other:
"Huh-MMPffuhh...huh-MMPfff...huh-MMPfffuhhh...huh-MMMppff." She
exhaled shakily, then started a long, irregular inhale. "Huh -- huh-huh
-- ha -- hahhhÉ" For one moment she froze, nostrils flaring, eyes
tearing, before she sneezed yet again, a full, wet sneeze.
"Ha-ISSHHHoooo! Uhh-" 
       As she sniffled several times, wiping her eyes with the back of her
hand, he approached and silently handed her a napkin. She looked up,
surprised, giving him a clear view of her red, watery, but still lovely
hazel eyes. Her nose was even redder and seemed slightly swollen. 
       "Thak you," she said in a somewhat hoarse, congested-sounding
voice as she took the napkin and blew her nose, then wiped it.
       "Sounds like a rotten cold," he said, trying to sound casual. "You
shouldn't hold those in, though."
       "Oh, I dow," she replied, then sniffled again hard, trying to clear
her nose. "But it's not a cold, it's allergies. Hay fever, mainly, although
that perfume my friend was wearing didn't help. Sometimes stifling the
sneezes helps hold off the -- " Her eyes widened suddenly in surprise as
she inhaled uncontrollably, and she turned away just in time to sneeze
twice, violently. into the sodden napkin: "HEH-issshhh!
HEHHH-ishhhhooo!" She turned back, and sheepishly concluded, "-- the
fit."
       "Doesn't look like it works too well," he said, smiling. He noticed that
she was trying to find a dry corner of the napkin, and quickly handed
her another one. She laughed a little before wiping her eyes and nose
again.
       "Well, stadding -- " she sniffled hard, wetly -- "Uhh. Standing here
by the door with the pollen coming in might have something to do with it,
but it's better than annoying everyone at the bar."
       "Do you work around here?" he asked.
       "Yes, at Danvers and Martin. You?"
       He smiled. "I'm one floor beneath you, at the conservation society."
       "Funny," she replied, smiling back. "I thought I might have seen
you around."
       Before he could answer, her eyes squinted slightly. "Oh doh, here
cubs adother...excuse be..." She turned away but he watched her in
profile as her deep inhales turned to short, quick breaths. "Huh -- huh
-- huh -- " She turned even further away and brought the napkin up to
her nose, but paused for a moment. He tried not to stare, but it wasn't
easy. Finally, she relaxed, let out her breath, and turned back to him,
wiping her eyes again and sniffling. "Did'dt wadt to cub out, I guess."
       "You sound terrible," he said as she blew her nose and coughed a
little. "Do you take anything for that?"
       "No, nothing works," she replied, then smiled. "By the way, thanks
for the rescue." She held up the napkins wadded in her hand. "Are you
always this well prepared?"
       "Only when I see a damsel in distress," he answered, but she was
suddenly distracted by the return of the tickle in her nose, eyes closing
and hand fanning in front of her face. She spoke in between her
uncontrollable inhales.
       "Oh god -- ah-huh -- I ab godda sdeeze -- huh -- huhhh -- I'b
sorry -- huh-ahhhhhh..."
       "No need to apologize," he thought to himself, as she turned in
profile again and launched into a full-blown sneezing fit, not even
bothering to try and stifle them this time. She would sneeze convulsively
several times in a row, the last one sounding as though it took all the
breath out of her body, then inhale with a desperate sound and start
over. He'd never heard or seen anything like it.       "Hah-ISSHHHOOO! --
ISHHooo -- ASHHHooo -- IIISSHHooo --
iiiIIIIsshhh!...huhhhhhh...Hah-ASHHOOOOO! -- ISHHooo -- ASHooo --
aaaAAASHH!"
       He didn't know where to look, but realized that there was no way she
could tell he was staring, caught as she was in the violent paroxysm. She
sneezed again and again into the wad of napkins, occasionally letting out
a soft whimper when she got enough breath, but always heading straight
into another series of sneezes.
       After about two or three minutes of this, she finally tapered off, still
sneezing every ten seconds or so but not as constantly as before. He
handed her the last napkin, and she took it without looking at him.
       "Tha -- ha-ESHooo! -- thak you. Huh...oh god...huh-ESHooo! ESHooo!
Uhhh...I have got to stop sdeezing!"
       "Not on my account," he thought again. Her eyes were even redder
and more watery than before, and her nose was running endlessly,
though she dabbed it constantly with the napkin. And she looked
stunning.
       "Are you okay?"
       She coughed, then sniffed and cleared her scratchy throat. "Sort of.
I think I better go home." 
       "Do you need a ride?" he asked, trying to sound casual while his
heart was pounding.
       She opened her mouth to reply, but took both herself and him by
surprise by turning away and sneezing violently instead, with no
warning whatsoever. "HESHHHooo! Ohh..." She turned back and sniffled,
but her nose was so blocked by now that it didn't seem to do any good.
"Ub...baybe that would be a good idea. I dod't dow if I ahhh...huh, huh --
if I cad drive like this." She sniffled again from the vanished sneeze,
barely taking in any air at all, and rubbed her tickly nose.       "Okay,
let's get you home," he said, and began to walk toward the exit. Halfway
there, he heard two high-pitched gasps behind him, and turned to find
her in the expression he had come to know well: eyes mostly closed,
eyebrows raised, nostrils flaring and trembling slightly, mouth
half-open. "Oh dow...there's wod bore...I cad feel it ahhh --
huh-huh-huhhhh!..." Her hand hovered a few inches in front of her face,
so he had a better view than ever before when she inhaled unsteadily,
her eyes squeezed shut, her mouth opened, and she sneezed
convulsively with a wet, congested sound and a fine spray from her nose
and mouth, jerking her head down. "Hah-ASHOOOO!" She sniffed, but
immediately squinted her eyes closed again. "Oh god...ahhgahhh..." She
sneezed again with an exhausted, desperate sound as she bent over:
"huh-ISSHHHoooo! Ohh-" She opened her red, streaming eyes wearily
and rubbed them and her sore nose with the back of her hand, looking
miserable.
       He handed her the last napkin. "You poor thing," he said kindly,
secretly delighted but hiding it well. 
       She took the napkin and gently dabbed at her eyes and nose,
sniffling and coughing a little. "I dod't dow how to thak you for this,"
she said in a voice made even hoarser by the last two violent sneezes.
       "You already have," he thought to himself. To her, he replied "It's
nothing. Let's get to my car."
       They headed for the exit and walked out of the restaurant that had,
in one night, quickly become his favorite place ever.